I'll See You At The Debates, Beeyotches.

The Diva is not a Paris Hilton fan. She seems to be the patron saint of the vapid, meaningless (talentless) and self-indulgent, but I might have been selling her a teeny bit short. After watching how she handled the whole John McCain fiasco I have elevated her on my Diva-meter (She is definitely several steps above the Dread Pirate Heather now, which is not saying much, but it is a promotion in rank never the less.)

Now, let's discuss what brought this all about. Obviously someone was very confused and ill informed, and for once it wasn't Miss Paris. We all know that crap flinging, lying, and plain old nastiness go hand and hand with U.S. politics.... but poor John. He must have been having brain fart.

Come on, John, you are supposed to heap the doo doo on your OPPONENT, not some silly socialite who is as political as a rutabaga.

She didn't know him from any other "wrinkly, white-haired guy" (her quote) but I guess she googled him up and came to the understanding that he was someone kinda' important : " (McCain is) the oldest celebrity in the world, like super-old; old enough to remember when dancing was a sin and beer was served in a bucket".

The world is now concerned that John may have forgotten who is running against. Hint: it ain't the skinny white blond chick...think darker, think male...well, you can still think skinny. I sure hope that McCain's campaign staff creates cue cards or something so that he learns the difference between Obama, Paris and Brittany. Mercy!

Anyway, here is Paris Hilton's response. It amused the Diva this morning... and starting my day off with a chuckle is always delicious. Enjoy!

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die

Well, it is time for the flying monkeys to refresh my double espresso martini, plump up my 1,000 count Egyptian cotton covered pillows, and for the Aging Disco Diva to start her work day. Being the Queen Mother of the whole f*ing universe is hard work but someone has to do it.

Money Can't Buy Me Love....

Honestly, the Diva just cannot understand this whole Paris Hilton schtick. Other than daddy's money (or the money from grandpa that she will be getting through daddy because grandpa cut her out of the will) why is she famous?

Anyone? Anyone? Class? Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?

Is she famous because she is a great songstress?

Sheyat no, but the studio technician who tried, in vain, to do something with that voice should get a big chunk o' grandpa's dough for the herculean effort that had to have been involved.

Is she famous because she is a great actress?



Oh friggin hell NO:

As of April 3, 2008, the review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes reported that 5% of critics gave "The Hottie or the Nottie" positive reviews. Metacritic reported the film had an average score of 6 out of 100 — indicating "extreme dislike or disgust." IGN gave it a 0 star review, saying "Hottie and the Nottie presents a problem because there are just no words to adequately express how clumsy, trite and deeply offensive it is from start to finish." Rolling Stone film critic Peter Travers gave the film a half-star rating, saying that the half-star was because "it takes guts (or gross dim-wittedness) [for Hilton] to appear on screen again after House of Wax." And film critic Scott Feinberg reported that a colleague muttered, "Shoot me in the f*cking face," during a Boston press screening of the film. As of April 2008, the film is ranked #1 in the IMDb Bottom 100 with a rating of 1.1 out of 10.

Is she famous because she is so brilliant?

What is so damn sad is that these were the ACTUAL quotes taken from the deposition... they are not made up, people. She did not know the difference between her left shoulder and right shoulder. OMFG.

Hey Paris, your left boob is hanging out...no, your OTHER left boob...

Is she famous because she is such a wonderful humanitarian, philanthropist and all around model citizen?

That's a big ole': 不, nr, non, nein, αριθ, いいえ, não, нет, NO....

Regardless of the "whys"; she IS famous...famous enough to have words created to describe her:

On the June 14, 2007 edition of Countdown with Keith Olbermann, Michael Musto coined the word 'celebutard' (combination of the words 'celebrity,' 'debutante' and 'retard') to describe celebutaunte Paris Hilton.

Maybe, just maybe... her fifteen minutes of truly head-scratching (and if the gossip is to be believed..other parts are a scratching too) fame is about up:

Search for Paris’ new BFF not going so well

The search for Paris Hilton’s new best friend is not going as well as the heiress would have hoped. The first kink in the plan? The turnout at the New York City casting call for “hot bitches and fierce guys” turned out a paltry 40 to 50 people, according to most reports from insiders. In fact, at least one media outlet that was genuinely interested in doing a story on the process of casting the newest Hilton hanger-on was told at the last minute that no press would be better than any press.

Hilton reacted as any young person in her position would — by posting to MySpace for damage control. Hilton claimed there were “NO open calls for the show” and that “every event is exclusive and hand-picked by invitation only ... I didn't want my potential BFFs to have to wait in a long open-call lines.”

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