She's back in the Exploding Pinto Again!

Well....I am back. I was able to escape, I mean check out, from the Lindsay Lohan "It's just exhaustion" Spa of the Stars.



It took me a couple of months to gather back my damn flying monkeys--I mean honestly--who was going to do the manual labor around here? Divas don't do work; it is our birthright to laze about and expect others to slave for our right to drink champagne and nibble on Godiva Chocolates served on gold plated trays. I was gone for a brief (2 year) hiatus and I found that one third of my flying monkeys were living (and running from blimps) with Gary Busey,




one third were up in friggin' CANADA, of all places, hanging out with Randy and Eva Quaid, wearing foil hats and running from "Star Wackers".... and might I add I DEEPLY resent being called that...I shall be only addressed by my official moniker: The Aging Disco Diva Queen of the Whole Damn Universe. The other third of my aerial simians were getting ready to fly out to England to help with the royal wedding. Oh hell no, I am the original princess and that royalwannabe Kate (you know, the one marrying the prince that thank GOD looked like his mum and not Charles) can just get her own help. I am back now so the flying monkeys and my legions of fans can get back to what they were created for: worship me from afar, pick me up when I pass out, do my bidding without question and read my pearls of wisdom.