Neanderthal Man

My rant for today….

Why is it that some people feel the need to go out of their way to show the world just how big of an A-hole they can be?

You would think that a walking, talking anus's (or would that be ani?) would try to downplay the fact that verbal excrement is what spews out of their mouths, but no…they want to make sure that everyone is aware of this fact.

Heath Ledger has died, regardless of how he died, what caused his death, etc., he is dead and a little girl has lost her daddy. Rather than having an ounce of civility we have some cretins who jump on the chance to be attention whores “Look at me! Look at me!” and commence with the verbal diarrhea. All I can say to them is STFU, please.

Here is what is causing the Aging Disco Diva to flip her polyester, neon-orange wig:

Nice, huh? I bet Fox News radio is really proud John Gibson. What a gem of a human being.

Some pinhead named the Ultimate Warrior weighed in on the subject by writing "His (Heath Ledger) kid is without a father, yes, but the negative influence is now removed and his own child has the chance for a full recovery."

Be sure your tetanus shots are updated before going to this idiot's website

I don’t know who the hell this guy is, never heard of the forker, evidently I don’t fit his key demographic of unemployed burger flippers, living in their parent’s basement, having seven teeth and half a brain in their heads. I am guessing by this picture that the steroids that shrinks men’s peters to about 1” must have wiped out the three remaining brain cells he had.

Shee-yat, he is so fuggly he makes Gene Simmons, in his Kiss make-up, look good…

Well, now that I am good and fired up, it is time to call the book club to order:

Chapter three

Tom had big dreams; he wanted to be a self-made millionaire by the age of 30 and even had a standing bet (that he never made good on) with his good friend: the first to earn a million dollars would buy the other a Mercedes (the other guy is still waiting) He would give himself ten years to become a successful actor, if he could not make it he would train as an pilot.

Every day Tom would take the bus from Glen Ridge to the City (NYC) to make the rounds of casting calls. Of course, just as in the case of his recollection of his school years, we have a disconnect with what Tom says he experienced and with what everyone else in his life remembers him experiencing. His recount is complete with lurid tales of being so poor that he had to walk (probably barefoot in the snow, uphill—both ways) to the Holland Tunnel where he would thumb for rides along with the prostitutes who “serviced” the commuters between New York and New Jersey. He claims that they would tell him that he could hitch a ride while they pick up johns…yeah…right. I am so sure that those tough New York hos (Think the anti-pretty woman kind of ladies of the evening) would invite this geeky white bread suburbia poster boy along for a ride. His girlfriend remembers it a bit differently “Tom borrowed his mother’s car” I guess a story of using mommy’s car is not as good as a story of hitching rides with crack whores.

Tired of borrowing mom’s car and commuting he borrowed $850 bucks from step-dad and rented an apartment on the Upper West Side. Again we have Tom’s version of what transpired which included nearly starving and living on hot dogs and rice…ironic because he went home every weekend and pigged out on home cooking.

Career-wise things were going well. He had “it” and was literally an overnight hit. He was cast in commercials and snagged small role in the movie “Endless Love” which was followed by the part of David Shawn in “Taps” where he meet fellow cast members Sean Penn and Timothy Hutton. The three young actors became close friends.

This also marked some big changes in Tom’s life. He fired Tobe Gibson, the woman who was like a second mother, who had lovingly guiding her protégée to success. She found out she was fired when she received a telegram from Cruise that read “Your services are no longer required” He also dumped his long time girlfriend “I love you but I’m not in love with you anymore.” He replaced his high school sweetheart with Melissa Gilbert (“Little House on the Prairie”)

He moved to Hollywood and became part of the “Brat Pack” Some of his hometown friends were less than impressed with Tom’s new friends, finding Sean Penn to be an obnoxious SOB asshole (some things never change, eh?) and not caring for the “new” Tom whom they characterized as now being “insufferable, arrogant, utterly self-absorbed and unapproachable” His sister Cass confessed that during this time she felt that “Tom had gotten too cocky” and “hard to be around” Tom hired Paula Wagner as his agent and signed a contract to star in the movie “Losin’ It” (yeah, I never heard of it either) It was a flop, but the fact that it was largely ignored, while “Taps” was a box office success lessened it’s impact on Tom’s career.

Next came the plumb role of Steve Randle in “The Outsiders” directed by Francis Ford Coppola. The ensemble cast included Matt Dillon, Patrick Swayze, Ralph Macchio, Diane Lane Emilio Estevez, Rob Lowe and C. Thomas Howell. Tom did a great job as one of the “Greasers”

This was followed by the role that made Tom Cruise a star: Joel Goodsen in “Risky Business”

He apparently was a PITA on the set, and other cast members do not think of him too kindly, even to this day. He tried to get Rebecca De Morney fired, but the producer, Steve Tisch, ignored his complaints. His opinion of her acting must have changed because they became involved during the filming of the movie. The movie catapulted his career and cemented his image as a teen hottie.

Chapter three summary (on a score of 0 to 4 cups of espresso)

Overall interest: (3 out of 4 cups)

Juicy gossip: (2 out of 4 cups)

Believability of facts presented: (4 out of 4 cups)

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